Friday, 8 October 2010

Lily's Friday Prediction

So... gotta choose last week's winner, huh? OK (drum roll brbrbrbrbrbrbrbr dudun.) The winner is... me! No, not really. Hell, I've already spent the last five hours judging a fiction comp; but this is much harder because the genre is ma thang.

As always there were some great entries; Chris Allinotte's bloomin' spider - do you have to do that to me Chris? Great stuff! Joleen's slaughterhouse party - loved it. My London chav twat tale - mmmn, not sure. David Barber's brilliant two blokes - so simple, I couldn't do that in a million years. Sue Harding's ultimate delight - ale and libraries. Excellent! Col Bury dropped in with his Brummie fuckwit - splendid stuff.

Seriously... David Barber wins for making me laugh out loud. This week I want to recoil in horror. Your words are:

  • Anonymous
  • Moulin Rouge
  • Transparent

Usual rules, plus a couple of requests. 100 words max flash fiction or poetry using all of the words above. Please post in the Comments box below. If you tweet, please tweet about your entry when it's in. Chars.
______________________________________________

14 comments:

  1. Okay - just read mine over before posting, and realized it's now two very similar stories in a row - but c'mon Lil - Moulin Rouge? My hands were tied. ;-)

    On y dance

    Lars's friends thought he was crazy to want to visit the burned remains of the Moulin Rouge, but it was worth it - even though so far, he hadn't seen anything unusual.

    Suddenly hearing voices from behind the stage, Lars sprinted to the dressing rooms.

    Before him were seven women; anonymous, gorgeous, and transparent.

    "Voulez-vous couchez avec nous, monsieur?" breathed a short blonde ghost to his left.

    "Yes ... oui. Oui!, he stammered.

    "C'est bien." said another. As they surrounded him, their fa├žade of flesh melted away, revealing their charred and ruined true faces beneath.

    Somewhere, music started playing.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Qu'elle est belle, cette histoire. Superb visuals in this, Chris!

    "...seven women; anonymous, gorgeous, and transparent". What a great line.

    I absolutely love the concept - feels like it could expand into a full-scale story.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Congrats to David!

    I really like that, Chris! You got an awful lot in for the word count, great imagery in particular. The last few lines are perfect. Nice work.

    Here's my try...

    The Tourist

    Anna stepped off the plane at Charles deGaulle airport, eagerly anticipating her visits to the Eiffel Tower, Bastille and Moulin Rouge. She walked slowly toward the trains, loving how easy it was to be anonymous in a place like this. It didn’t take her long to spot one. A woman with her map out. So clearly a tourist, so clearly alone. Perfect.

    Anna waited till the woman walked toward a toilet, and followed her. The stranger shrieked as Anna became transparent before her eyes, and stepped into her skin. Paris, she smiled with her new face.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Jo, I love how this starts as a wistful travel tale, then spirals with rising menace to a superbly chilling and unexpected ending. That's what I call a Walk-In Part. Excellent - made me shiver.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thanks Lily - out of all the flashes I've put up here, this one I may actually go on to expand...

    Joleen - I'm with Lily- you capture us with her exhuberance and then whack us in the face with her dark intent. Lovely!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Chris - the 'charred ad ruined faces' got me! (just had my lunch and nearly 'enjoyed' it all over again - yuk!) ;-)

    Joleen - creepy! Made me really shudder! Very good! :-)

    This has come straight off the top of my head, Lily (and under the 100-count for once!) so I apologise if it's a bit below par.

    Make Yourself At Home

    Whoever told Nicole Kidman she could sing and dance? Still, I missed ‘Moulin Rouge’ when it first came out. Nice of you to let me watch it on your DVD.

    You don’t mind watching it again, do you? No, you have that transparent look on your face, lying there on the couch.

    Another beer? Don’t mind if I do, thanks. I’d get you one as well but then you’ve already made such a shitty mess everywhere.

    I’m sorry about the bloodstains, though. But, if you will open the door to anonymous callers…..

    ReplyDelete
  7. Good one Sue. Succinct and gruesome. Scary thing is, I reckon this kind of thing happens more often than we'd like to think. Oh, and btw, I LOVE that film. Tart's boudoir.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thankye, ma'am!

    (I did as I was told and 'Tweeted' the prediction ;-) )

    ReplyDelete
  9. Excellent Sue - thanks!

    Now. Better get working on mine.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Poppy Red

    The Tarot deck blurred in a laudanum haze. Lily flicked The Wheel of Fortune back and forth through her fingers until - hypnotised - her client handed over a wad of francs. She snatched it away. The punter had wanted to remain anonymous but Lily read him like a book; the most secretive were usually the most transparent. Looking up and down the empty alley she drew a stiletto blade and quickly slit the man’s throat. Ornate rings fell from dead fingers into Lily’s hands.

    The Moulin Rouge called; a different type of client there. But first, tonight she could afford opium.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Late as usual. I have no excuse other than my head is up my arse at the moment. Anyway, here goes...

    Blood Lust.

    The shadows swallowed me up. I needed to stay anonymous, invisible to the eyes of the dancers leaving the Moulin Rouge.

    There she was, the American I wanted, and tonight would be the night.

    She bade farewell to her colleagues and started her journey to her small apartment. I watched her, listening to her sweet voice as she sang the songs from her performance.

    The streets of Montmartre echoed her footsteps as I swooped down on her, clasping a hand over her face. The skin of her neck looked almost transparent, giving no protection as my teeth sank into it.

    ReplyDelete
  12. That's going to be the title of my next novel
    "The Man With His Head Up His Arse", theme tune of the screenplay adapted from Kate Bush's "The Man With The Child In His Eyes." Sorry Kate.

    You have been missed, David Barber. Congrats on winning last week's challenge!

    This week's Blood Lust is a great piece. Atmospheric with a suggestion of dark Belle Epoque in the delivery of words. I really enjoyed that last line.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Thanks Lily. I'm also trying to get my head round my novel at the mo as well as earning some coin.

    We went to Paris for our 10th wedding Anniversary and stayed round that area. There are some cool cobbled streets there.

    Chris-Great story, mate. Nice and spooky.

    Jolene-Loved it. A lot said in a few words.

    Sue-Sick and twisted......and great!!

    Lily-Opium? I hope you mean perfume? Lol! A great story from you, as usual.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Sue - a skilful play on the "intruder" theme. Setting the violence against that movie is a great touch.

    Lily - some real gritty atmosphere here. You always hear the expression "Slit yer throat as soon as look at ya." Well - there you go. And a homicidal Tarot reader to boot. Lovely.

    David - went to Paris on my honeymoon - the whole damned city is picturesque - how is that fair to the rest of the world?? This is a really tight, clean "urban vamp" write, with a good payoff at the end. Well done.

    ReplyDelete

Lily Childs is a writer of horror, esoteric, mystery and chilling fiction.

If you see her dancing outside in a thunder storm - don't try to bring her in. She's safe.